


The Most Important Things (are the Hardest to Say)

by Makkoska



Series: Small Things [6]
Category: Naruto
Genre: F/M, Happy Ending AU, M/M, Mundane, Sequel, Soap Opera, canonis AU, i can't believe i'm posting this, old konoha, same-sex parents
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-04
Updated: 2014-08-06
Packaged: 2018-02-03 09:54:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 20,378
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1740383
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Makkoska/pseuds/Makkoska
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Life, as life is just bound to do, goes on. A continuation to the Small Things Series. HashiMada, happy ending AU.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So far I thought I’ll never post this thing. Too many OCs, too many changes compared to canon. However, I now find the recent manga happenings so shitty that I figured I don’t have to be ashamed to post anything.  
> If this didn’t put you off from reading, please heed the warnings: OCs and all kind of stuff happening that you can usually watch on Hallmark channel 4 in the afternoon.  
> Also, this is at this point massively a WIP.  
> If you didn’t read It’s the Small Things and Those Everyday Things, this won’t make much sense.

 

 

“Dad, can I talk to you?”

 

Hashirama emerged from under his desk, where he’d been busy trying to hide papers in his overflowing drawers so his brother wouldn’t see them lying on his desk and assume (correctly) that he hadn’t dealt with them yet. Tobirama took on the habit of regularly checking on him in the evenings and he wasn’t too keen listening to him ranting about the importance of accurately done paperwork as he usually did. A bit flushed for being caught in the act, but altogether happy to see his daughter as always, he straightened up, brushing out the hair from his face and came over to greet her.

 

Aina returned his hug rather tensely and her smile was strained too. Hashirama sat down on the edge of his table, his own grin fading seeing her grim expression.

 

“What’s the matter darling?”

 

“It’s… I need to ask you something, dad. Rather, to tell you something.”

 

“Did something happen on the mission?” he asked, concerned. She just returned from one, he well knew. He rarely had any peace of mind, now that all three of their children lived as shinobi is supposed to live. He couldn’t even keep thirteen years old Noboru away from fights, lucky that his position allowed him to at least filter the too dangerous ones. But both Takumi and Aina claimed they were adults now and demanded him to assign them proper missions. She looked unharmed, even if a bit pale, but some wounds were invisible to the eye - the ones that healed the most difficult, scars of the soul, a lost comrade due to a wrong decision, a jutsu that didn’t take effect as it was supposed to,  and affected the whole team…

 

“No, it’s nothing like that…” Aina looked down at her toes, apparently searching for words. Hashirama remembered a conversation like this, from three years ago, when his then fourteen years old daughter had her first serious crush... Maybe it was a similar problem this time too?

 

“Is it something to do with a boy?”

 

“You could say that,” Aina sighed, but didn’t look as if she wanted to share more.

 

“I know it’s been hard on you since Hideki left…” Actually _leaving_ was a very gentle way to put it. Aina had broken up with his boyfriend for a year amid a huge quarrel then cried loudly whole night a few months ago. Hashirama remembered it as one of the most terrible days in his life, as he tried to comfort - in vain - his devastated daughter while two of his wood clones did everything they could to hold Madara back from going after the boy to do something fatally unpleasant to him, something that not even the Hokage’s partner could do without consequences. Like gutting him. He was really protective of their daughter. “Do you still miss…?”

 

“It’s not about Hideki .”

 

“So is there someone new?” It was good to hear, though of course the news worried him a bit too. Aina tended to switch between boys trying to win her favour. She fell in love so easily… and fell out of it just as quickly. Hashirama would have liked her to find some nice, dependable young man who could make her happy and with whom she could settle down with. Sometimes it was very hard not to tell her so.

 

“You could say that…”

 

“So is it someone from your team? I was always sure Jorou fancied you…”

 

“No, it’s not…”

 

“Then is it maybe…?”

 

“Dad, would you stop guessing?” she snapped. “I’m trying to tell you something important here!”

 

“Sorry, sorry,” he held up his hands, trying to remain silent. Aina just stared at him and he realized she was trying to gather her courage for whatever she wanted to talk about. That was foreboding as generally she wasn’t afraid of anything. “You know you can tell me whatever’s on your mind, darling,” he prompted softly.

 

“Dad, I’m pregnant.”

 

Hashirama blinked at her, at loss for words. What can you say to an announcement like that? _But you’re only seventeen!_ came to his mind first, but he gulped that back. _How is that possible?_ seemed way too ignorant and _Madara will kill me for letting this happen!_ just sounded selfish.

 

“How… I mean… who…?” he croaked at last.

 

Aina crossed her arms and looked sideways. She was hurt obviously, but before Hashirama could amend his words, she replied.

 

“If you mean who’s the father, it’s Minoru Rinha.”

 

“Oh. I didn’t know you are together…” Hashirama had a hard time recalling the boy, a couple of years older than Aina. He wasn’t really a noticeable ninja, but if Aina loved him, that would be enough...

 

“We’re not.”

 

“Oh.”

 

“It was a one-time-thing, and…”

 

_“Oh!”_

 

“Dad. Don’t worry,” Aina said on a firm voice, setting her chin up, and that was such a nonsense thing to say under the circumstances that Hashirama didn’t manage more than to blink at her. “I don’t want to bring shame to you, so I already made plans to move to another village - before anyone here would notice anything.”

 

“What are you talking about, darling?” the Senju asked, totally dumfounded.

 

“Dad,” her daughter sighed, the way Madara always did when he deemed his lover too slow. “You did so much to me already, and I don’t want to pay it back with making you and Madara- san the gossip matter of the village.”

 

“Why would you…”

 

“I’m _obviously_ not going to marry Minoru, but what would people say, if the Hokage’s adopted daughter gave birth to a… _bastard.”_

 

“Oh.” he was repeating himself, he knew.

 

“So before it becomes obvious, I’m going to…”

 

“Aina, honey,” Hashirama found his voice at last. “Madara and I’ve been raising you three and living together for years. Do you honestly think either he or me would care what people say about your pregnancy?”

 

“But that’s…”

 

“If we learned anything, it’s how not to care about gossipers.”

 

“But…”

 

“You don’t think we’d _let you_ go away when you need our support more than ever, do you?”

 

“Dad…”

 

“Why have you ever thought we’d abandon you so? We are your family after all and…”

 

Tears started to roll down the girl’s cheeks, silently at first, but when Hashirama tried to wipe them off with the back of him hand, they turned into choked, throaty sobs. He gathered her in his arms and held her close until she calmed down, her wet face pressed against his chest.

 

“Aren’t you mad?” she mumbled after a while. “ _Why_ aren’t you mad?”

 

“Aina, honey, I’m just worried. You are so young and…” _barely more than a child yourself_ , “… you know there are ways to _not to_ have this baby…” as a medic himself, he was aware how to abort a pregnancy without endangering the mother, even if he wasn’t at ease with the idea. Still, it was probably better than giving birth if she didn’t want to.

 

“I…” his daughter sniffed, rubbing her cheeks against his shirt. It was a gesture she did ever since Hashirama knew her; trying to disguise the marks of crying after he comforted her. “I can’t do that, dad. I’ve been thinking this through. I want to give this child a home just as you have given it to me. That’s why I said I’ll move away, so…”

 

“Don’t worry,” Hashirama said, and he managed to sound calm despite the thoughts chasing around wildly in his mind. “He or she will be welcome to the family.”

 

“Madara-san will be so mad at me.”

 

“No,” he denied firmly. “He won’t be mad at you.” Which was the truth – he would be at Hashirama though, and it was better not to even think about what he might do to the unfortunate father-to-be. “Just let me talk to him first.”

 

“Are you sure?”

 

“Yes, it will be better that way. You just don’t worry – you shouldn’t overtax yourself at any rate. Don’t you want to sit down?” worry twisted his guts suddenly as the news finally sank in. What did he know about pregnancies? The very basics a medic should know, but that wasn’t the same as dealing with it in practice. He would definitely need to consult this with… gods, who should he turn to? Tobirama came to mind instantly, being a proud father for two years now, but he discarded the idea. He didn’t need additional problems right now, and the younger Senju would definitely not be pleased with this development. And what the hell could he say to Madara that wouldn’t result in bloodshed? There would be the baby coming… when exactly? In less than nine months at any rate, and he needed to get prepared… To what, he didn’t even know. They raised their children together, but as his brother once put it, they got them _ready made,_ they didn’t prepare them for dealing with a newborn. Aina didn’t have a mother to comfort her and to give her advice, he should have realized in time that she’d need someone from her own gender to turn to for guidance…

 

“I think it’s rather you who need to sit down,” Aina peered at him sceptically. “Are _you_ all right?”

 

“Yes, yes, just a bit dizzy…”

 

“I know it’s a shock, but dad… thank you. You don’t know how much this means to me.”

 

“Honey, I’m your father. This is the least I can do. That reminds me – does your brothers know?”

 

“Only Takumi and only because he caught me when I was throwing up.”

 

“Were you feeling sick?!”

 

“It’s apparently completely normal,” she soothed him, obviously barely resisting rolling her eyes.

 

“I guess it is. I need to do a research and see…”

 

“It’s just pregnancy, dad. You don’t need to fret over it.”

 

“You’re talking about the birth of my first grandchild young lady, I maintain the right to fret all that I want over it!”

 

“All right, grandpa,” Aina smirked and cuddled close once again, letting him support her weight.

They stood like that for a while. Hashirama bathed in the feeling of being needed, and the happiness of her daughter turning him in need. It was such a pleasant sensation that it even managed to cloud the rather frightening thought of becoming a grandfather at thirty-eight.

 

 

******

 

Aina washed her face before leaving the Hokage’s office. She still felt shaky, but she put that down to her hormones – all books she read agreed that pregnant women were bound to be less balanced. She hated that, it made her feel weak. Really, breaking down and crying, when she’d been so firm in her resolve to leave the village, to cause the less possible harm to her family.

 

She’d been ashamed for being so stupid for allowing something like this to happen to her, for the ordeal this might mean to the most important people. She was ready to take the blame – she _wanted to_ take the blame when she decided to talk to her father, but he didn’t let her.

 

She smiled into the mirror above the sink. Her face was still flushed and her eyes red, but she looked a bit better. It was easy to believe everything was going to be all right when dad said so.

 

She clearly remembered _that day_ , ten years ago. She had been so lost – standing in their empty house, while men she didn’t know told her that her mother wouldn’t be back. Just like her father hadn’t come back one day. She remembered the fear – what would happen to her? Would they take her away some place where children, whose parents were gone lived, or was she expected to get by on her own from now on?

 

Than another man came, and she knew him by site. Her mum always pointed him out when they saw him on the streets, saying _“Look at Hokage-sama! Thanks to him, we can sleep safely in our bed at night.”_ Saying that he was there to protect them all. But in the end, that was a lie.

 

She still remembered how tears clouded her vision, how close she was shouting at him for failing to protect her mother, which was supposed to be his job.

 

Than the man crouched down in front of her and hugged her. He had deep, sad eyes and warm, wide palms and despite her will, seven years old Aina started to trust him instantly.

 

“I’m so sorry,” he said. “This shouldn’t have happened. If you want to, you can live with us – I’ll make sure that no further harm will come to you.”

 

She believed him and that was a decision she never regretted.

 

Takumi was waiting for her, sitting on a bench under the shadows of trees. Seeing her shaky smile and cried-out eyes he snorted.

 

“I told you that you were being an idiot!” he claimed, louder than necessary which showed he was worried too. “There’s no way he’d send you away. You’re his favourite after all.”

 

“No, I’m not!” she denied, secretly pleased with him saying that. “He’d be the same to you!”

 

“Just Noboru or I can’t get pregnant.”

 

“You don’t know how lucky you are,” Aina murmured. Sometimes she felt it unfair, being the only female in the family. Guys got it so much easier. They didn’t have to worry much about how their clothes looked like, how their hair looked like, of monthly periods or tits being a damn hindrance when you were dashing among trees on a mission… nor about getting knocked up on one silly, drunken night  by a guy you don’t even particularly fancy.

 

“So what did he say?”

 

“That it’s going to be alight. He wasn’t angry at all – just a bit overwhelmed, I guess. And that he’s going to talk to Madara-san first.”

 

“So you got it easy, didn’t you?”

 

Aina sighed, feeling guilty. Despite Hashirama’s insurance, she was sure their other adopting father wouldn’t take this turn of events easily. She was a coward for letting dad handle it, but if she feared something, it was disappointing Madara-san.

 

“You know how he is like – what he thinks how we should live is too conservative for easily accepting something like this.”

 

“Rather hypocrite of him, isn’t it?” Takumi muttered. “Him living with dad is much more scandalous than you getting…”

 

“Don’t say it like that!” Aina snapped, glaring angrily at him. It annoyed her that she had to look up to do that.  Her brother grew so much in the last year or so, into a gangly, awkward sixteen years old. “You know that he wants the best for us, to be able to be proud of us…”

 

“Honestly, you’re worse than father! There’s a limit to adoring someone - after a point it just gets crazy.”

 

“Are you telling me you don’t care what he thinks?!”

 

“No, I don’t! Just that he might not be always right. He’s only human too, you know.”

 

“Hmph,” she mumbled, unconvinced. From the day she set her eyes on him, she was completely bewitched by the Uchiha’s charm. As far as she was concerned what he said or thought was the right way of saying and thinking things. She used to be so firm on her beliefs that one day she’s going to find a boy who was just as - or almost as - great as him. Well, she thought sourly, putting his hand over her still-flat belly, her chances were now worse than ever for that.

 

“What’s with the long face?” Takumi questioned her.

 

“I was just wondering if I ruined my whole life.”

 

“You’re just being an idiot again. Everything will turn out for the best.”

 

“Nothing’s gonna be the same again!” she snapped. “I’m going to be a mother,” saying it out loud seemed to make it real somehow. Tears started to cloud her vision again, so she swiped them angrily away with her sleeve. “I’ll never find a proper boyfriend now.”

 

“Is that really your biggest problem? You’re… you’re the Hokage’s daughter. And you don’t look too bad. Guys will line up to adopt your kid.”

 

“Thanks, I guess,” Aina muttered, but she couldn’t help but smile at this not-quite compliment. At least he was trying.

 

“And you know that we’ll help you too. That should count.”

 

“That’s pretty much the most important,” she assured him, stopping to hug him. Takumi flushed red from being embraced publicly, but she didn’t let him go until he started to fidget.

 


	2. Chapter 2

 

Hashirama paced his office in a vain attempt to calm himself, but it didn’t have the desired effect - he was just getting increasingly more nervous at each turn. He was usually comfortable with making decisions, but this time he just couldn’t settle on one thing that was the best solution to everyone. He needed advice – problem was that the two persons he could turn to for it – who liked to give him advice, whether he wanted or not, really- were Madara and his brother. The very same two persons who were bound to have the worst reactions to the news of Aina’s pregnancy.

 

It wasn’t the first time he felt at loss when it came to handling his children. He wondered if it was the same for parents raising their own too. It was no use, asking Tobirama about this –his son was too young yet to give this kind of trouble to him, and he would deny having any problems anyhow.

 

And Aina – it was even more difficult with Aina than with the two boys. Maybe because she was a girl, and Hashirama admittedly didn’t know much about girls. She was stubborn, fierce but vulnerable. Not unlike Madara, though funnily his partner always said their daughter was a bit too much like Hashirama.

 

But in the way she dealt with pains of the heart, she wasn’t like any of her fathers. It wasn’t the first time Hashirama had headaches over it, though previous occasions weren’t as serious.

There was that memorable first time for a heartbreak of course…

 

*/*/*

 

“Dad, Aina isn’t home yet!” Noboru said as a kind of a greeting as soon as he stepped through the door. He looked worried so Hashirama smiled at him reassuringly. It wasn’t like him to tell on his sister - to the contrary, Aina or Takumi could do anything and he would keep silent, even if it meant taking punishment when he was innocent. Not that Hashirama punished them, ever.

 

“Well, she is a big girl now…” though she was anything but, at fourteen.

 

“But Madara-san said that she should always be home by the time you arrive, and she promised!”

 

He picked up their youngest and he clung to his neck. He was an insecure little thing, he couldn’t overcome his fear of losing his family – again. His wounds lied too deep and only time and love could heal them.

 

“Daaaad!” Takumi yelled from the other room. “Aina isn’t home yet!”

 

“So I heard! Why don’t we give her a bit more time…”

 

“But Madara-san made her promise…”

 

“Yes, I heard that too. But Madara-san is on a mission tonight, so why don’t we do what _I_ say for a change?”

 

“You’re setting us a bad example,” Takumi peered at him from behind the partially pulled closed door. As the gods knew what he was doing, but surely something he shouldn’t be, Hashirama ignored his comment.

 

He remembered being fourteen, and the need to go places and do things his family didn’t know about. He was at the time meeting Madara secretly, and it was very probable that Aina’s late homecoming was due to a boy too. It wasn’t as if she couldn’t defend herself or if Konoha was a dangerous place, so he wasn’t worried.

 

But when Noboru already fallen asleep with his head in his lap, as he refused to go to bed before his sister arrived and Takumi was shooting increasingly nervous peeps at the door every second minute or so, he decided to go an look for her.

 

He didn’t take long – he looked for her favourite spots and found her on a bench near the Hokage building. She glanced up guiltily as he approached and shifted over to give him space. Her eyes were puffy and red from crying.

 

“It’s late, isn’t it?” she asked on a weak voice.

 

“Rather late. I thought you’re supposed to get home before I do.”

 

“I know. Sorry.”

 

“What happened?”

 

“I… Nothing, really.”

 

“I don’t think Madara will like that answer…”

 

“You’re not gonna tell him about this, are you?!” she asked, horrified, and Hashirama had to struggle to keep a straight face.

 

“Not, if you tell me what’s the matter.”

 

“It’s stupid…” she sighed when he didn’t let it go, but wedged closer to him. “You know Riku…?”

 

Yes, Hashirama knew Yamanaka Riku, if for nothing else, for how his daughter mentioned him ten times a day recently. He found it cute, though Madara was not amused by it, saying Aina could spare her attention on someone better, _an Uchiha maybe_.  When Hashirama asked him whether he thought fondly of his first crush, he narrowed his eyes and muttered that he was still suffering that crush every day… that was a nice memory, especially how it continued in their bed, but really, it wasn't appropriate to think about that when sitting next to his distraught daughter.

 

“So what happened with him?” he prompted.

 

“He’s a bloody idiot!” Aina snapped, sitting up straight, tears rolling steadily down her cheeks. “I don’t want to see him! Ever. Again.”

 

“What did he…?”

 

“It’s so unfair! I thought I found my true love, and now it turns out he’s just a selfish, stupid kid!” She was sobbing now, so Hashirama pulled her close.

 

“What did he do?” he asked quietly, feeling anger rising in him. He promised himself that he wouldn’t interfere with their children’s decisions – at least not much – but seeing Aina so hurt did make him want to do something bad to this Riku.

 

“It doesn’t matter.”

 

“Did he try to do something to you? Something you didn’t want?” he asked, his silent fury raising another notch at the possibility. Aina lifted her wet face and blinked at him confused, before understating what he meant.

 

“Oh no. He didn’t do anything like _that,_ ” and damn if she didn’t sound disappointed. “He was just… I just realized I don’t like him that much at all.”

 

“You have plenty of time to meet better guys yet, you know,” Hashirama smiled at her, that terrible, murderous intent against the unsuspecting fourteen years old boy easing up.

 

“But I thought… that it will be like with you and Madara-san. I meet him now and love him till the end of my life,” she sighed sadly, but at least she wasn’t crying any longer. “Did you know he was the true one when you met?”

 

“No…I don’t think I realized that for a long-long time.”

 

“How’s that possible?”

 

“Well, it’s not the same for boys, you know. And he was a boy too. Then he was an Uchiha. Then there was your uncle telling me what I should do with my life. It was all very confusing.”

 

“So all boys are stupid?” she asked, frowning in displeasure.

 

“Probably.”

 

“And how long did it take you to realise?”

 

“Hmm. I don’t think I did before I almost lost him for good.”

 

“There was a time like that?” Aina asked with eyes opened wide, her own heartache forgotten for the moment. She loved hearing stories about Madara, and Hashirama often indulged her. It wasn’t as if he didn’t love telling stories about Madara.

 

“Do you promise not to pass this on? Especially to Tobirama?”

 

“I promise,” Aina whispered, obviously excited to be trusted with such a secret.

 

“It was the time when I almost agreed to marry Mito-san,” ignoring his daughter’s horrified _You what?!_  he continued. “Madara decided to leave me for good. I never learned where he wanted to go…” _To pursue my real dream,_ he had said. Hashirama never forgot that. It never stopped bugging him.

 

“But you didn’t let him?”

 

“I – I at least went after him. Then got attacked on the way after him by Iwagakure, who decided to murder me at the worst possible time…”

 

“But you beat them quickly, rushed after him and convinced him to stay?”

 

“Err… Well there was no need to, really, as he came back to see how I was doing… I was injured rather badly and he decided he needed to stay as I wasn’t able to survive alone. That’s it,” he finished clumsily, his palm unconsciously rubbing the faded scar that lay beneath his shirt, feeling that he didn’t do justice for their story.

 

“I’m sure he didn’t stay because of _that_ only,” Aina stated confidentially, leaning against him. “But why did you wanted to marry Mito-san at all?”

 

“Duty, expectations…”

 

“How old fashioned,” she grimaced and Hashirama grinned.

 

“But before it was too late, I realized I’m about to make a terrible decision. That has to count.”

 

“Yeah,” she was silent for so long that Hashirama was about to suggest them to go home. “I hope I’ll find that too.”

 

“Common sense?”

 

“True love.”

 

*/*/*

 

Hashirama smiled fondly at the memory, even if it was bittersweet. Was every girl this problematic when it came to love? Falling for a boy then after the rapid realization he was not the right one, ditching him… than starting again. Add to the mix one night stands (and just when did she started having a sexlife? Or was it better if remained unknown?), and it was a clear path to catastrophe.

 

One thing was for sure. He needed the advice of someone who was more familiar with these kinds of issues. He knew already who he can turn to, there was just a bit of problem with that.

 

The relationship between him and his brother’s wife was painfully formal. He could never be sure if Mito resented him for declining their marriage and choosing a man instead of her. But what was now important is that she was a young woman, a mother and a relative by marriage. She surely would help.

 

Tobirama was bound to drop by soon. If he timed right, he could sneak off without meeting him to talk to Mito in private.

 

 

*/*/*

 

“Hashirama-san,” Mito greeted his brother-in-law with a surprise she didn’t even try to disguise. “I’m afraid Tobirama-san is not home… In fact I think he went to your office…?”

 

“Yeah, I know. I came to talk to you, if you don’t mind,” he gave her an embarrassed grin and scratched his nape. How could a grown up man, the Hokage no less, appear like a teen set up by his friends to ask a girl out, she didn’t know. She wasn’t sure what to think of it either. He had a certain charm and it annoyed her that she wasn’t unaffected. “Can I come in?” he prompted, and Mito, just realizing she was blocking the way, stepped aside.

 

“Ha’ma!” Butsuma yelled when he saw him, running up to him as fast as his tiny legs could carry him. Hashirama picked up his nephew to spin him around and he laughed in joy. Mito found herself smiling. Put aside her contradictory feelings towards the man, he was certainly good with children. More relaxed than her husband was definitely.

 

“So what can I help you with?” she asked, maybe too bluntly to be really polite, when he was seated. Butsuma was piling up his toys in his lap, and he was putting up a show, picking up and admiring every piece.

 

“He’s such a cute little chap,” he said, ignoring her question. “I was totally dumbfounded when Tobirama named him after father, but you know what? It has now become his name. It no longer sounds strange.”

 

“Yes,” she said curtly, wanting him to get to the point.

 

“Tobirama is very proud of him, you know.”

 

“Yes, I’m aware. He’s the one to carry on your bloodline, after all,” she added with a certain degree of spite. She was getting pissed rapidly. The women of the Uzumaki were not known for their patience and she was no exception.

 

“That’s there too,” he smiled and didn’t appear to be affronted at all. “But who could not love him? Must be quite something to raise a child from the moment he was born.”

 

“Well, if you want that, I’m sure you can find candidates for a mother.”

 

“Err…”

 

“Or I’m sure someone would give the Hokage their newborn if…”

 

“Well, actually, it appears there will be a newborn coming to the family…”

 

She studied him, not sure what to make of this. Would he mean his own child – it was hard to picture him cheating on his partner, but men were men after all. She couldn’t help but feel insulted – she’d never quite forgiven him for cancelling their wedding, for choosing such a scandalous, unheard-of relationship instead. She remembered all too well the excitement when her father told her of the offer of marriage from him and the shame when the news arrived that he wouldn’t be bonding with her after all. And the reason for it. Her mother told her it was all for the better – he could have agreed on the marriage but still seek out the company of men, that if nothing else, this was fair of him. But she still had to endure the gossips and gleeful sniggers behind her back.

 

She talked about this only once with her husband, who wasn’t very keen to discuss the strangeness of his brother. “I should have known,” he’d said curtly “Hashirama was just always bad with girls.”

 

So to think that this man, who never seemed to have an eye for anyone else but Uchiha Madara, would have a child from a woman felt like a bucket of cold water poured right over her head. But maybe she was misunderstanding something…

 

“Yours?” she questioned. “Or your lover’s?”

 

“Oh no!” he denied instantly, appearing surprised by the suggestion. “Can I ask you not to tell this to Tobirama? I desperately need your advice, but don’t want him to know yet.”

 

She nodded, resentment replaced by curiosity at these mysterious happenings.

 

“Aina is pregnant,” he whispered, leaning in close.

 

“Gods!” she clasped her hand in front of her mouth. “Is she alright? Who’s the father? When are they getting married?”

 

“She’s… all right I guess. The father… it’s not that important at this point, as she’s not getting married. She said she doesn’t love him, so…there’s no point in forcing it, is there?”

 

“You’re a very strange man, Hashirama-san,” she said quietly. “What will people say behind her back, have you considered? And what will they say about you, too…”

 

“Mito-san… People will always gossip. They’ll get over this quickly, believe me, I know. Soon enough every scandal is yesterday’s news. But how could I force my daughter to live with someone she doesn’t want to, after I chose the life I did?”

 

“Aina is very lucky that you chose to be her father,” she said honestly, and he smiled at her gratefully.  Butsuma, who got tired of trying to catch his uncle’s attention, came to sit in her lap, and she caressed his hair, which was white and soft as his father’s, gently.

 

“But I don’t know a thing about pregnant women or newborn babies. I don’t know yet how to tell this to Madara… or Tobirama for that matter… and now I’m clueless what to do, how to help her… what to prepare for. Would you be willing to help me?” he asked desperately and for the first time since she knew him she found she could smile at him warmly, without any negative feelings weighting her chest.

 

“Yes. Yes of course. Aina is a lovely young lady, and she will need guidance. I know you have the best intentions, but… there are things men shouldn’t be involved in too deeply. Like giving birth.”

 

“You know I’m a healer…”

 

“I know. And I also know that I would have gone mad if my father wanted to be present when Butsuma was born.”

 

“But…”

 

“No buts!” she rode him over, too deep in her thoughts to care much about being abrupt. “Aina needs to come over to me as often as she can… or I can visit her too. We also need to get a good, trustworthy midwife. Oh gods, she’s so young and was without a mother’s guidance for so long… I’m sure that’s why it happened. Have you ever talked to her about – you know. What happens when a man and woman get together?”

 

“Err... I figured it out myself, so I thought she’d just do the same…”

 

“That’s… well. Apparently she did.”

 

“Look, Mito-san,” Hashirama said irritably “I know you don’t have a high opinion of me, but I did my best at raising her.”

 

“That’s not it. I’m sure you did, but… you should have asked for my help much sooner,” her mind was already busy with all the things they’d need to do in the next couple of months. She didn’t feel like caring about his wounded pride. She charged on, things to talk to Aina about, things to buy, worst case scenarios, best case scenarios, what a pregnant woman needs, what a baby needs, difficulties to overcome…

 

“What part the father will take if they don’t marry?”

 

“Err…” Her brother-in-law seemed lost with all the information and demands thrown at him.

 

“He _knows_ about the pregnancy, right?” she asked with suspicion.

 

“I’m not sure… haven’t asked…”

 

She sighed, adding this to her to do list as well. Really, what have they thought, that two men could raise a girl properly. Look where it led.

 

Hashirama leaned over the low table and clasped her hand between his two palms. Mito was so surprised by this gesture that she forgot to pull it away.

 

“Mito-san…” he said looking into her eyes deeply. She usually hated how she found him so handsome, but this time she didn’t resent him for it. He was a really kind man – maybe her husband was right and despite all his might, he wasn’t the sharpest one, but certainly very loving. He was a good father and would have made a good husband. But she no longer minded he wasn’t hers. It was an unburdening revelation. “I’m really grateful. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

 

“Papa!” Butsuma suddenly cried and jumped down from her lap and Mito had to repress a cringe.

 

“May I ask _what the hell is going on here?”_ Tobirama picked up their son, but didn’t stop glaring daggers at them.

 

“Brother,” Hashirama pulled his hands away. “Why don’t you stop sneaking up on people?”

 

“This is _my_ house. I come home, not sneak in. Mito…”

 

“My dear,” she stood up to greet him. This was a very troublesome day. Compared to his older sibling, her husband hid his warm side very carefully and got irritated very easily. And there was his constant jealousy of his brother that he thought he masked well. All in all, she wasn’t looking forward trying to explain the situation without revealing too much. “Hashirama-san came to ask me some advice regarding Aina.”

 

“And just why was he holding your hand?” he demanded.

 

“Brother,” Hashirama stepped up to them. “You have the most charming wife, but certainly you don’t think you need to be afraid that _I_ do anything I shouldn’t do with her. If you don’t trust me that much, be reassured that I go for…”

 

“Oh, shut up,” Tobirama muttered, but he obviously relaxed. “You usually ask _me_ for advice.”

 

“But you know as much about raising teenage girls than I do. I finished early in the office today, so…”

 

“About that. What were all those reports doing crumpled in your drawers?”

 

“Tobirama! You went through my drawers…?!”

 

“Well, you were not _hiding_ anything there, were you?”

 

Mito reached out and took Butsuma from her husband’s arms. She would have preferred if he didn’t learn this type of behaviour. It took her months after she’d come to Konoha to recognise; Tobirama cared deeply for his brother, he was just not the best showing it.

 

“If you’ll have a little brother,” she told their son “don’t let him argue with you all the time.”

 

“Well, he’ll be a smart older brother so the little ones can look up at him and trust him, won’t you son?”

 

“I think that’s my clue to go,” Hashirama tousled Butsuma’s hair and he squealed his name – at least his version of it – happily.  “Mito-san, thank you for your help again.”

 

“No need to thank,” she replied and wished he didn’t say anything at all. He could feel her husband’s eyes on her, and she knew he’ll try to get all the details from her. Lucky thing that she could be trusted with a secret.

 


	3. Chapter 3

*/*/*

 

“Aina, it’s me. Can I come in?” Takumi waited impatiently to be allowed in. Four years ago, when he’d been twelve, he learned the hard way that one does not enter his older sister’s room without permission. He couldn’t even tell what had been worse, the beating he got from Aina or the lecture from Madara-san.

 

“A minute!” she called.  Then “Ok, I’m ready.”

 

She was standing in front of her mirror, smoothing down her shirt on her belly and looking at it anxiously from different angles.

 

“It doesn’t show yet,” Takumi reassured her and took the opportunity to stare at her longer than it was appropriate. She was pretty as always with her short, messy hair and slim figure.  She had her usual, practical clothes on. “You’re not going on a mission, are you?” He’d assumed that she would be staying at home and resting for most of the time, but she got angry at him even for the suggestion, saying that she can live a _normal life_ for long moths still.

 

“No, I don’t have one today. I’m visiting Mito-san.”

 

“What for?”

 

“Dad apparently thinks she can help me to get prepared… you know. With the baby.” she sighed, displeased. “I’m not convinced, but he was very enthusiastic.”

 

“So Uncle knows about it too…?”

 

“I hope not!” she spun around, eyes wide. “You know how he is! I surely would have to listen to hours of lecture. Then he’d want to marry me off.”

 

“Or he simply would go and castrate Minoru,” not that was an idea without merit or something the little shit wouldn’t deserve. “Mito-san was really a better candidate to confide to, if dad couldn’t keep it to himself.”

 

“I just don’t know what she’ll help with really. It’s not that I _need_ help.”

 

“Well, she did give birth already, so might have a few tips…” Takumi said tentatively. He was not all that convinced that Aina was as fine without help as she always claimed. Not for the first time he wished he was the older – he could provide a shoulder to lean on. It was nice to be trusted with secrets, but recently he started to want more than that. It was all very jumbled and connected with his awakening non-brotherly feelings towards her. He was confused, torn between despising himself for it and the reassurance that they were not relatives by blood, so urges like to go and beat Minoru fucking Rinha into a bloody pulp for daring to touch her was not so terrible. Or even wanting to embrace her and promise her that he’d always protect her was alright.

 

He hoped Aina didn’t suspect anything, that no one suspected anything. He could just imagine how displeased Madara-san would be with him, and despite all his quiet rebel against  the way he ruled their lives – something nobody else in the family seemed to mind at all – he cared a lot what he thought about him.

 

He remembered clearly, the day he realized that the Uchiha was not always right, and that no matter how Hashirama acted around him, in the eyes of the villagers, his word mattered more than anyone else’s, including Madara-san. That in fact, he probably only held the position he did due to the status of his lover. That at thirteen had been quite a shock.

 

 

*/*/*

 

“...again! Brother! You can’t allow him to do as he pleases! Why do we have to have this argument again and again?!”

 

“It’s only you who argue, Tobirama…”

 

“That’s absolutely not the point! He left his team without any instructions in the middle of nowhere, endangering them and the whole mission. And this is not the first time it happened, you know very well!”

 

“Madara just… he doesn’t like to work in a team much. And you have to admit, he’s very efficient. He does it to protect others you know…”

 

Uncle Tobirama smashed his fist against the wall in anger, and Takumi used the cover of the noise to shift his position a bit. His hiding place - an unused chest in the corner of the room - was really small and his legs were falling asleep. He hid here when he escaped his sensei after a bit too successful prank jutsu, which resulted in the old man finding himself with close to no clothes on in front of a popular dango store and its screaming owner, and he wanted to wait for dad as he could usually count on him for being understanding of him wanting to escape (maybe justifiable) punishment. But he entered his office accompanied by his brother, already deep in a muffled argument. By now it was no longer muffled, and boy thought it wiser to keep his presence in secret, So he kept quiet as he peered out on the cracks that decorated the rather sue-eaten sides of the furniture. He knew - everybody knew - that there was no love lost between Madara-san and their uncle, but he never heard him being so enraged. He was rather frightening like this, his chakra almost tangible around him.

 

“You just keep making excuses for him! You act as if he can’t do a thing wrong, while…”

 

“Tobirama,” dad sighed. “I’ll talk to him, alright? But let’s face it - you make ten times more fuss if he acts out of line than if anyone else does.”

 

“Because he’s ten times more dangerous than anyone else! If not for you, he couldn’t stay here at all.”

 

“The village is as much as his as yours or mine, brother.”

 

“Hashirama… I resigned myself for him having this… this role in your life he has, but you still have to see how he is. Everyone is afraid of him, or distrustful of him and for a reason. You might be strong enough to protect yourself, but what will anyone else do if one day he snaps? And he has three children around...”

 

“That is… that’s over the line brother,” dad’s voice took on a chilling tone. Takumi couldn’t see his face clearly as he was facing away, but he couldn’t picture him having his usual jovial expression on when talking with such cold authority. He heard how people called him, _the god of shinobi,_ and spoke of his power, but it never really sank in, how mighty he was. He’d never imagined his uncle backing down from an argument, but now he fall silent at the older Senju’s warning. They seemed to do nothing more than staring at each other for a while.

 

“At least try to be less prejudiced when it comes to him,” he said with quiet contempt at last before walking out.

 

Takumi tried to shift his weight again without making a noise and wished his father would go too. After witnessing this quarrel he didn’t feel like coming out from hiding. His heart skipped a beat when dad came over to the chest he was crouching in and stared at it thoughtfully.

 

“Such an old piece of furniture. I wonder if I should just throw it out…” his tone was light and teasing, all trace of that low growl of command gone and Takumi couldn’t completely stifle a giggle.  “And it’s squeaking too! Maybe we have mice in it?” He opened it up, and grabbed the boy who tried to escape next to his legs across the chest. “Oh yes we have! Here it is!”

 

“Dad, put me down! I’m too old for this!” Takumi protested and tried not to enjoy the playful struggling too obviously. He let him go, which was kind of disappointing, but at least he didn’t ask why he was hiding. “I didn’t mean to eavesdrop,” the boy said “I just didn’t really feel like coming out after uncle was like… that.”

 

“Yes, I rather want to go into hiding too when he starts…”

 

“Dad…?”

 

“Hm?”

 

“Nothing,” he realized there was no point in asking him whether Uncle Tobirama was right or not. Hashirama had such an obviously high opinion on their other adopting father that he’d never admit him having any fault at all. He’d just go and ask Uncle about it.

 

*/*/*

 

Takumi sighed. Later he had asked, and though the younger Senju was surprisingly reserved about saying _too much_ bad about Madara, the seed of doubt was planted in him that day. So he watched and evaluated. He was always good at that, thinking a situation through emotionlessly, making up tactics. It didn’t take him long to realize, even at thirteen, that the high regard his family had for Madara-san was not something that was widely shared. It had been quite a shock. He did try to be more critical from then on, while to be honest he still craved his appreciation like he did before and it hurt no less than his two siblings were more often praised then him. That Madara-san considered him more trouble than the others. By now they were – well not on bad terms, but certainly had some tenseness between them.

 

He sighed again. Aina shoot him a curious glance, se he pretended he didn’t, and smiled at her. He insisted accompanying her on the “long and dangerous journey” as she has sardonically put it, to Mito-san. He’d do better to provide her entertainment then getting lost in his own issues.

 

*/*/*

 

_Something was going on._

 

It was hard to pinpoint at first, nothing more than an obscure, heavy feeling in the pit of his stomach, his six sense telling him that something was… off. It was easy to put it down to his paranoia, his habit of doubting and untrusting even those who proved themselves trustable. _Even_ Hashirama...

 

 _Especially_ Hashirama.

 

Maybe he tended to watch him, looking for suspicious signs because deep inside he expected betrayal. And now he found the tell-tale hints.

 

What Madara couldn’t tell yet, what the signs were actually telling about, so he settled for watching. Watched how Aina and Takumi whispered and fall silent when he got near. The way their adopted daughter kept shooting guilty glances at Hashirama random times. The suspiciously straight face Takumi kept all the time, as if he wasn’t an incorrigible troublemaker. The calculating look Hashirama cast at him at times he thought he wasn’t paying attention.

 

Who do they think they were fooling?

 

Apparently only Noboru was innocent but he was always the best behaved of the three. Four if he counted Hashirama too.

 

It was infuriating really. Madara wasn’t used to his lover keeping secrets from him and that he did so indicated something serious. He could have asked straight away - the Senju would quite probably tell the truth - but he didn’t _feel like_ asking. That would be admitting he _cared_ whether he kept secrets or not. He was sure he could find out what it was about on his own too.

 

The main partner in crime was quite obviously Aina. Too often did the both of them stay out for late, their girl giving excuses of a wide rage, Hashirama claiming too much work…  Takumi - he was aware of what was happening too, but given his often sour expression, wasn’t approving. Were they providing cover for the father?

 

Once  -or twice- he tried tailing Hashirama, but didn’t manage to catch him doing anything suspicious. He was being careful - that was ominous in itself. But who knew what he was doing when Madara was away on a mission? With all his sycophants around, who thought the sun shone out his hard Senju arse. Those who were so pathetically grateful for his protection and the more dangerous ones, who stayed close in hopes of getting a share of his power and were willing to do anything for it...

 

All signs lead to one thing. He suspected right at the moment when he noticed the first suspicious clues, but took him a couple of days to come to terms with the fact, because it was something he wasn’t prepared for. Hashirama had another lover.

 

It was… surprising. Insulting. Infuriating. With each passing day when he didn’t comfort the other man and he didn’t come to confess either it was betting worse and worse. Despite himself he started to guess who they can be but he couldn’t decide on a single person. There were no lack of candidates. Under his still calm surface he felt burning, murderous rage. Even deeper, he was aware of his sadness and feeling of loneliness too, but he did his best to crush them.

  
Hashirama… was going to pay.


	4. Chapter 4

 

*/*/*

 

_Something was going on._

 

Something was going on, and of course it was something to do with Hashirama. It was puzzling him, irritating him since that afternoon when he caught his brother in suspicious, secret conversation - _and holding hands -_ with his wife. Mito steadily avoided his interrogation attempts, saying close to nothing on the matter, shrugging his questioning off with half-sentences like her brother-in-law just needed tips with his stubborn adopted daughter, that it wasn’t anything Tobirama needed to concern himself with.

 

If it wasn’t for Hashirama’s continuously dodgy behaviour, he would have believed her. It was rather frightening, the way she could lie to him with such a straight face, but maybe he just gotten soft with how his brother was so terrible in keeping secrets and wasn’t used to such an expert. Women were strange creatures. Maybe it was because he lived the majority of his life amongst men - his brothers, with his father, with the mainly male warriors of his clan - but he found Mito harder to read than anyone else. He had to admit that he found it a seductive trait.

 

Clueless of what to do with his wife’s behaviour, he decided to let that go, and rather focused on the core of the problem.

 

His initial thought was that whatever this hush-hush was about, it surely concerned Madara. It wasn’t paranoia, not when Hashirama acting off always meant he was trying to cover something regarding Madara.

 

 _Sneaking off to secret meetings as a kid, wanting to make peace with the Uchiha no matter the cost, wanting to name Madara the Hokage, declining marriage, getting an almost-fatal injury without providing any real explanation after, leaving Tobirama in the village and taking the Uchiha with him for negotiations with the leaders of other countries, saying the tree of them couldn’t leave the place alone at the same time and spending time away way longer than it was necessary…_ the list could go on.

 

But it didn’t take him too much investigation to accept that this time Madara was as - well not innocent, he couldn’t use that word when it came to him - but as clueless as him. He was so obviously angry and frustrated with Hashirama, while was very badly trying to hide it, that he couldn’t place the blame on him.

 

So what the hell was it about? It drove him up the wall that he didn’t know.

 

Asking his brother straight provided no results either.

 

“Tobirama,” he just sighed, not looking up while he arranged the papers on his desk into neat little piles, maybe trying to make the appearance of working on them. “if there’s something I’m not telling you, surely I have a reason for it.”

 

“You’re admitting you’re not telling me something then?” he was getting very annoyed how read and signed reports were getting mixed up with untouched ones. Maybe he was just playing with them as kids with little blocks, building towers or the gods knew what.

 

“I was not saying that,” his brother, this overgrown brat peered up at him for a second, before he started on a new pile, once again completely ignoring the system Tobirama set for him for grouping and organizing his paperwork. The white haired Senju grit his teeth at the sight. “I’m just saying that I’ve no obligation to report you all the steps of my life…”

 

“Hmpf,” it wasn’t as if Tobirama couldn’t find out what it was about whether he wanted to confide or not. “Stop doing that! You’re making a complete mess,” he pulled his chair close and started to put everything back to its proper place, rereading the more important pieces to make sure they had been dealt with. When Hashirama said he’ll go and get a cup of water he just muttered an absent _yeah sure_. Only hours later did he realize that he never came back, thus effectively avoided any further questioning. Damn him, he could be smart when he wanted to be.

 

 

*/*/*

 

_Something was going on._

 

Something was going on and once again he was being left out of it. It was so unfair, just because he was younger than Aina and Takumi they tended to leave him behind. _Just to protect you,_ Aina would say which was even worse than how Takumi had teased him once.

_We can’t have Madara-san’s little favourite being corrupted by our evil, non-Uchiha ways,_

 

Well, _Madara-san’s little favourite_ knew very well how to spy out information. His older siblings might have thought themselves oh so clever, but Noboru had no serious problems finding out what they were hiding. He just didn’t really know what to make with it.

 

After all, he knew nothing of pregnancies, babies and all the lot involved. He used to have a little sister, when he’d been still living with his _real_ family, but that had been so long ago, and he was so young at the time, that he could recall her even less than his parents. She cried a lot, that he could remember, she screwed up her little red face very funnily and screeched from the bottoms of her tiny lungs. Mother had been very proud of her. She died before their parents did though.

 

Would Aina’s baby be like that too? Small, loud and fragile? How on earth could she be a mother, when she was just four years older than Noboru?

 

And why wasn’t she confiding him too, as she did with Takumi? Was he less of a brother?

 

It kept bothering him. It hurt. He didn’t want these changes at all. His whole life was a constant change, with losing his original family one by one, with getting used to the new one.  This was just going to upset the delicate balance they had up till now. Still, he could cope with that, he could help, if he was deemed _worthy of_ knowing it…

 

He was in a piss-poor mood, but nobody in the family seemed to realize. Dad, Aina and Takumi were too busy with their secret, Madara-san was too busy with his missions probably. His teammates noticed his bad temper though and kept clear of him.  They were a bit afraid of him anyhow, not that he ever hurt them, simply because who his fathers were. The adored Hokage and the feared Uchiha Madara. They just didn’t know how to relate to him.

 

Noboru had asked Takumi once if he ever had similar problems with his friends. The gangly teen thought about it then shrugged, saying that sure he did, but everyone just got over it after a while. He got it so much easier, with his cheerful, easy-going attitude. He told the younger boy to just smile more and act as if nothing was wrong, but Noboru didn’t manage to follow his advice. He was too suspicious of others by nature for that and never felt like reaching out to make the first steps to befriend anyone.

 

Not that he needed them as friends. _Cowards and losers,_ he thought with spite as he sat alone on a bench in the shadows, feeling very lonely and miserable.

 

But a bad day obviously always had the possibility of becoming even worse.

 

“Aww, look if it’s not ickle Uchiha-chan there with a long face!”

 

Noboru tried not to show any emotions as he kept facing away the older boys. He knew the gang, they liked to pick on him, apparently thinking it’s a great entertainment to make snide comments about him. They now found him alone in the park, and that obviously made them bolder, grouping around him. _Oh bloody perfect._

 

“I’ve asked what’s wrong!” their gang leader barked. “Daddy Hokage spanked you for being a bad boy?”

 

“Don’t you dare to talk about my father,” Noboru growled, even though he knew from experience that the only ignoring them worked. But they caught him by surprise - usually it was just Uchiha this - Uchiha that they liked to criticise and not him being the son of Hashirama.  

 

“Ooh, don’t look at me like that, I’m getting scared!” they laughed, forming a loose circle around him. “Was I too close to the truth? Is he keeping you around to have a younger Uchiha at hand when the other gets too old?”

 

The boy gaped at them at first. Nobody, _nobody_ ever talked about his father like that. Villagers might have a few unfair, spiteful words for Madara-san when they thought he wasn’t listening, but not of Hashirama. He was, he supposed to be untouchable by such scum, even in words. The others seemed nervous about it, but were obviously too much of an arselickers not to laugh along with their leader.

 

“How dare you,” he found his voice at last “say something like that? He’s your Hokage and protects your useless hide, mention him only with respect!”

 

“Yami, you really shouldn’t…” one of them said tentatively.

 

“Oh shut up!” the tallest boy snapped. “My father told me how he is, with his disgusting lover in their unnatural relationship. And the village allows such a man to lead them…”

 

“You _shut up_ ,” Noboru stood up, taking a threatening step forward, uncaring that he was a head shorter and three years younger and that Yami had four of his friends with him. “You know nothing of _my fathers!_ They are the heroes of Konoha…”

 

The taller boy shoved his shoulder, maybe wanting nothing more than to force him back, but it was the last straw. Barely seeing his opponent through the red fog clouding his vision he hit him with all he could give. The blood that started to run from Yami’s nose satisfyingly splattered the young Uchiha’s knuckles, but he hardly had any time to enjoy it as the next instant the four other was on him too.

 

He could have defeated them. Forget what he’d learned as a genin, the trainings Madara-san put him through made him more than a competent warrior at the age of thirteen. But very probably he couldn’t do it without causing them serious harm. He wouldn’t feel grief over it, but he didn’t want that kind of trouble for his dad, not when he was fighting to protect his good name, so mentally he prepared himself for the solid beating he was about to receive...

 

“What the hell is going on here?! Get off him!”

 

Quickly and effectively they were separated. Without much enthusiasm Noboru peered up at his saviours. It was Sarutobi Hiruzen, his uncle’s favourite student and his gangly friend who always stuck around him. He seemed as sour and dissatisfied with having to stop five older boys beating him up as he did with pretty much everything.

 

“Danzo, check if everything is okay with Noboru. I’ll talk to these chaps.”

 

Over the short, energetic young man’s loud _“Just what do you think you were doing, you should be ashamed attacking someone younger than you like that”_ the Uchiha could hardly hear the other’s quiet words.

 

“Get cleared up. I guess you can manage on your own?”

 

“Of course I can,” Noboru said angrily, though he was feeling dizzy. “I didn’t need you to interfere.”

 

“Well, we really can’t have the Hokage’s _adopted_ son to get beaten up in the middle of the village. What would Hashirama-sama say?” he couldn’t be sure, but he thought he heard mocking in his low tones.

 

“He won’t need to say anything, as he doesn’t need to know,” the teen stated, staring up steadily at the Shimura.

 

“I agree. He has enough on his mind already.”

 

“Danzo, what are you saying?” Hiruzen bounced up to them, obviously finished with scolding the other boys. “He might be hurt, Hokage-sama would surely want to check his bruises.”

 

“I’m all right!” he protested angrily. This was bad enough, he really didn’t want anyone else to know about it, least of all his fathers. “I didn’t ask for your help! I don’t want you to interfere anymore!”

 

“Now, watch your tongue....”  

 

“No, it’s okay Danzo, leave it.” Hiruzen looked at Noboru with serious eyes. “If we don’t talk to him, and this happens again…”

 

“Then they will end up worse for wear.”

 

They left him alone shortly after that, and Noboru could sit down on the bench and continue to feel very miserable. He really didn’t want any trouble, he didn’t want his family to worry about him, he just wished he wouldn’t feel so alone. He was so lost in his dark thoughts that when his uncle suddenly sat down next to him he flinched. He didn’t see him coming, and he had always been a bit afraid of him. It was quite probably Madara-san’s distrust towards the man that made him edgy when he was near too.

 

“I hope they look worse than you do,” the Senju said after a bit of an uncomfortable silence. He was surely aware of Noboru’s feelings towards him, and there was his well-known bad opinion on the Uchiha clan too, which didn’t help their relationship either…

 

“So they told _you!”_ he was so affronted that he forgot all his politeness. “I asked them not to meddle…”

 

“You just asked them not to tell my brother, didn’t you?” he raised a white eyebrow at him, but didn’t seem insulted by his tone. “Don’t make this a bigger deal than it is. Boys get into fights all the time, though you have to be more cautious than others. You _are_ the Hokage’s son after all - you have to be conscious of his reputation.” The way he said that, simply the _son of the Hokage,_ no undertones that implied that he really wasn’t, warmed the teen’s heart towards him. He even smiled when he muttered, “If you can call it reputation.”

 

“I’m all right, uncle,” he tried to sound reassuring.

 

“I can see that. Though I wonder how you think you’d keep your little fight a secret with that bruise on your cheek. You will come to my house, Mito will patch you up a bit,” it was not an offer, but a statement. Noboru nodded his consent anyway, feeling grateful for him to treat this so matter of factly.

 

“Thank you,” the boy muttered. “I just don’t want to trouble dad.”

 

“Yes, he has enough on his mind lately, doesn’t he?”

 

“Yes,” he sighed, not suspecting a trap.

 

“So you know what’s going on!” his uncle turned towards him triumphantly. “Why don’t you tell me what’s happening?”

  
Oh crap. So the day was capable of getting even worse...

 

*/*/*


	5. Chapter 5

 

He was reaching the end of his rope. He waited for Hashirama to confess, he wanted it to be done and be over with. He apparently knew him none at all as he never thought him a coward - nor a cheater. Did he really think so little of Madara that he wouldn’t come and say straight his decision?  

 

Every morning when they woke he felt his eyes boring into him, could see him _almost_ confessing, but when he opened his mouth it was just something mundane coming out. _Be careful on the mission. I’ll need to go to Tobirama today evening. What a nice sunshine we have._

 

Madara could have killed him for it. Especially for the sunshine bit. Talking about the bloody weather when their life together was at its end.

 

Every night when they went to bed, Hashirama stared at him for an unspeakably long time in the dark, saying nothing, but still preventing him falling asleep.

 

Tension grew between them, getting more volatile by each day. Madara barked his replies to the stupid nothings Hashirama said instead what he should have, pulled away if he tried to touch him. Lack of sleep was also getting to him, making him even more irritated, if that was possible.

 

Then he just couldn’t take it anymore. If Hashirama wouldn’t, then _he_ was going to end it.

 

He felt calmer for making his decision. He, after all, knew all along that living with the Senju was an absurd idea and that it was bound to end badly.  It was simply accepting the inevitable.

 

It didn’t mean that he wasn’t planning to make Hashirama suffer as much as he did.

 

“Madara, are you alright?” the lying son of a whore had the audacity to question him. “I don’t think you said a single word to me today…”

 

“Why wouldn’t I be?” he turned towards him. He’d been staring out the window of their room, watching the night falling outside, brooding.   

 

“Well, you’ve been… acting off lately. Are you angry with me for something?”

 

“You shouldn’t be asking that. Aren’t you well aware of what you did?”

 

“Err…” his dark eyes darted sideways, confirming his guilt, not that Madara needed any more confirmation. Unfolding his arms he slowly walked up to him. His mouth pulled upwards into a mirthless smile. Enough of this. Enough.

 

He could see from the way Hashirama tensed up that he sensed the danger, but he stood his ground.

 

“Madara…” he reached out to caress his face and he let him. “Don’t do this.”

 

“I’m not doing anything yet.”

 

“Madara,” he repeated, caressing his cheek with his thumb. He was looking so worried - not worried what he might do to him, the fool, but worried for Madara. It was tempting to pretend nothing was amiss. On the other hand it was the most infuriating that he put up this act. “I can explain why…”

 

He wasn’t interested in explanations, not any longer. Pushing his fingers through the other’s silky locks he dragged his head down for a rough kiss. Suddenly and unexpectedly, as if struck by lightning, arousal ran though his body. He moaned into his lover’s mouth, his free hand fumbling to open up his clothes. It wasn’t what he planned, but he now knew what he wanted.

 

“Madara,” Hashirama gasped again. His eyes were smouldering with desire. So close, bodies pressed together, the Uchiha could feel him getting just as hard as he was.

 

“I don’t want you to talk now,” he warned. He pushed the shirt off his shoulders, fingers running over his muscles. He looked as powerful and intoxicating as he always did. He avoided the faded scar on his chest. He didn’t want to think about that night when his life changed and took this unexpected path. It proved to be a dead end after all.

 

“But…”

 

“Do I need to shut you up?” he whispered on a low voice. He kissed then bit into the taller man’s arm with just enough force not to be considered playful. Hashirama pulled him close, hands sliding to his hips, down his back to cup his arse.

 

“You are being very…”

 

“Hashirama. If you want to do this, shut up and get down on your knees.”

 

The Senju made a questioning glance towards the bed, but seeing his expression thought better of asking whether they should make it there. Instead he sank down, crouching back on his heels. Madara made sure to stare down at him without showing any emotion. He was so hard, his cock straining against the confines of his pants with an intensity that was painful. Lust was mixing with his fury and cold killing instinct, making him feel light headed.

 

Hashirama opened his trousers, pulling his erection free and cupping it in his palm for a torturously short moment before letting it go to drag the garments down completely. Madara’s hand found its way back into his hair, pulling his mouth close to where he wanted it to be with a rough twist if wrist. The other man’s eyes flickered to his face again, but he didn’t protest.

 

He took him into his mouth with well-practiced familiarity and Madara hissed his approval. But this time he just couldn’t be lost in the pleasure of the act. _This is the last time we’re doing this_ he kept thinking, and it was making him sad. He tried to chase the maudlin feeling away, concentrating on his lust and fury only.

 

Pulling on his hair further he pushed more deeply into Hashirama’s mouth. The Senju raised his hands to grasp his thighs, not for balance, he was more than capable to keep that in this situation too, but to control his movements. As much as he loved his touch under normal circumstances, this time Madara shrugged it off.

 

“Use your mouth only,” he commanded coldly. Hashirama muttered something, not that he could understand a word of it given what he was doing, but he still punished him with a firmer grip on his hair and a sharp shove of hips. It should have been more satisfying that it was when he didn’t complain any further, just set to suck him off with enthusiasm.

“Enough,” he hissed when he felt nearing his peak, dragging his lover’s head back. “I want you now.”

 

He really didn’t feel like delaying any longer, it wasn’t as if Hashirama couldn’t take him with next to no preparation, wasn’t as if he didn’t deserve some suffering in exchange to what Madara was feeling.

 

“You always have me,” the Senju gasped against his throat as he pushed into him. He was lying on his back, still on the floor with Madara kneeling on a pool of hastily shed clothes between his spread thighs. Not having anything to say to this lie, the Uchiha just drew his brows together, concentrating on trying to keep his rapidly crumbling self-control.  

 

Hashirama clasped his legs around his waist as Madara started to move, hard and fast. From behind the cover of his hair that tumbled forward he watched every reaction the other made, how he flinched in pain, how his lids fluttered close in pleasure. He found him so infuriatingly handsome just as before.   _But that shouldn’t matter anymore._

 

He leaned in closely, covering his taller, stronger body with his own. His lover for the past twelve years opened his eyes when he caressed his face, fingers sliding down to his throat.

 

“Madara?” he questioned on a hoarse voice.

 

The Uchiha’s fingers pressed together, though not firmly enough to close off air, _not yet._ He was bowing so low over the other that their foreheads touched. His hips was pistoling in sharply, his body was feeling the bliss of the act even if his mind wasn’t. He changed the angle of his thrusts, watched as Hashirama threw his head back and moaned. He loved watching him, pretending he had any kind of power over him.

 

He appeared vulnerable. Under his control. The Hokage, the _God of Shinobi -_ he could do anything to him now. Kill him if he wished so, with his weapons that were just out of reach, with concentrating chakra into the tip of his fingers and pushing them right through his windpipe...

 

Hashirama’s legs tightened around his waist, his muscles tensing as he found his release. He had his eyes closed, his mouth slightly agape in a silent cry…

 

Now was the time to do it if ever. _Now!_

 

He looked so good in the throes of passion. He loved him too much.

 

_Why have you done this to me?_

 

Madara came as well, his orgasm shaking him from head to toe, though it still wasn’t enough to smooth his thoughts. His fingers slid off from his lover’s throat as he collapsed on top of him. Their panting filled the silence of the room. He couldn’t do it.

 

“Why have you done this?” the Uchiha asked his question out loud. He no longer felt like killing Hashirama, he just wished he could pretend nothing was wrong.

 

“I guess you don’t mean us having sex on the floor part…?” the bastard Senju tried to joke. He raised his head to glare at him, and he smiled sheepishly, like a stupid kid. “I’m sorry,” he said more seriously. “I just didn’t know how to break the news.”

 

“Surely you knew I’d find out sooner or later.” Madara was proud that he managed to keep his voice cool and even.

 

“I’m sorry,” he really looked sorry as he reached out and caressed the Uchiha’s face gently.

 

“So who is he,” he gritted out. Let’s be over with this as soon as they could.

 

“Oh,” Hashirama hesitated for a moment before he decided to share this bit. “Minoru Rinha.”

 

Madara had a hard time recalling who he was talking about, but when he did, disgust twisted his stomach at the indignity. He was practically just a bloody kid, an absolutely unremarkable one for that too. He expected someone more _extraordinary_ would take his place…

 

“Just how old is he?” he gritted out from behind his teeth.

 

“I’m not sure… eighteen maybe? Around that.” He didn’t even sound ashamed with his admittance.

 

“How can you not know?!” Madara growled. He sit up and tried to get farther away from this man he knew not at all obviously, but he grabbed his arm to hold him back. “He’s so damned young!”

 

“He is still older than Aina…”

 

“What the hell Aina has to do with this?!”

 

“What do you mean? It’s all about Aina.”

 

They blinked at each other, confused, and suddenly Madara was starting to feel very ridiculous. He even gave up struggling to get free of Hashirama’s hold.

 

“I don’t know what you are blathering about,” he warned. “Don’t try to change the subject. Just when have you started to have your little love affair with that boy who you don’t even know how old is? Why have you…”

 

Hashirama started to laugh, effectively cutting him off. Madara straddled his thighs and pushed him back with a rough shove when he wanted to get up, so his skull hit the hard floor with a satisfactory loud thump.

 

“Ouch,” he patted his head, not that he kept any brain there that could be hurt. “Madara, I think you completely misunderstood the whole thing. I don’t have a… _love affair_ with anyone but you.”

 

“What?” this time he let him sit up and pull him close.

 

“I love you. I don’t want anyone but you. I thought you knew it by now.” He embraced him and the Uchiha, feeling more confused than relieved, put his head down on his strong shoulder.  They stayed like that for a long time, Hashirama patting his hair, Madara feeling very stupid. The way he said it, so… matter of factly… he couldn’t help but believe him. He placed a small kiss on his collarbone as a kind of apology for semi-seriously contemplating killing him. Then there was one question left…

 

“Hashirama. What the hell is going on?”

 

“Oh. It’s… Well.”

 

“Just what is happening with Aina.”

 

“Madara, please promise that you won’t get mad…”

 

Once again, the Uchiha grabbed his hair and yanked his head back to look him in the eye.

 

“Hashirama…What’s going on with my daughter?”

 

“Think through what I want to say before…all right, all right…” he sighed, meeting Madara’s murderous glare unflinching. “Aina is pregnant.”

 

“What…?” How was that possible? She was just a kid and… that Rinha boy! How dare he touch her, who knew what he’d done to her to make her agree to… to…

 

“Uh, Madara? You’re throttling me, ease off your fingers a bit…”

 

He always found him suspicious, he thought, feeling homicidal, ignoring that he hardly remembered the boy’s face. Scum like him shouldn’t be allowed even to live and definitely they shouldn’t take the courage to touch anyone from his family…

 

“Madara…”

 

He was going to pay. He would beg for mercy for ever daring to go near Aina…

 

“Madara, I can’t breathe!”

  
  
  
  
  



	6. Chapter 6

 

*/*/*

 

“Tell me again, why have I ever agreed to this whole absurd living-with-you, raising-children-together thing?”

 

“Shhh.”

 

“Don’t _shhh_ me. Just look at this mess. I really don’t need _this._ ”

 

“Madara…”

 

“Ehh…” he threw up his hands and stormed out of the room. In two minutes he was back, kneeling down next to Hashirama. He wetted a cloth and gently wiped the sweat off the boy’s forehead while the Senju continued to work on healing the grave injuries of the small body.  

 

When he was finished at last, sure that the little Uchiha would live, Hashirama sat back on his heels to watch his lover. Madara appeared to be unaware of the world, deeply lost in his own dark memories as he caressed the boy’s matted hair. Hashirama was sure who he was thinking about, not just because the kid’s lineage, but he also strongly resembled Madara’s long lost younger brother. Though Izuna had been older than this when he’d first saw him, he still couldn’t miss the similarities.

 

The sun started to rise outside - they were over a very long night. Madara returned home well before dawn, carrying the small, broken body in his arms. The boy barely had any life in him and his parents were not even this lucky. Madara and his team found them, the half-dead child and the two slaughtered adults, in the dark forest surrounding the village - the details weren’t known yet.

 

“The others stayed to investigate,” the Uchiha had told him when he’d set to try to heal the kid. “Hell knows what they were doing out there. I’ll need to speak with the clan too.”

 

He’d kept pacing the room while Hashirama used his healing powers to save the young life, occasionally muttering angry words at him, his clan, scum who murdered children so young they couldn’t possibly throw a shuriken, the village, his team… the Senju ignored him. He was too busy concentrating and he knew that anxiety didn’t bring the best out of his partner.

 

Now that he watched him he saw a gentler face - one that not many but him ever had the privilege to see. Saw him deeply troubled, caring, afraid for this boy. He reached out to caress his cheek gently. With a jolt Madara returned to the present.

 

“He’ll be all right now,” he reassured him. “Do you know who he is?”

 

“I knew who his father was,” the other man said with a tired sigh. “Nobody special really. I don’t even remember his wife. And now - they left the kid behind.”

 

“Another orphan.”

 

“Aren’t we supposed to stop this happening, Hashirama? Isn’t it what this village is for?” there was no accusation in his voice, just sadness. The Senju shifted closer to put an arm around his shoulders.

 

“We do what we can. Even if it’s not always enough.” he placed a gentle kiss on his lover’s template. Madara leaned into his embrace more.

 

“You know what I was thinking? There’s enough room here for one more kid.”

 

“That’s a good idea.”

 

“So that he can have a proper Uchiha upbringing.”

 

“I’m sure Aina and Takumi will love their new little brother as well.”

 

“Children are so troublesome.”

 

Hashirama just smiled and kissed him.

 

*/*/*

 

Teetering on the edge of sleep where he couldn’t quite tell present apart from memories, Hashirama smiled and burrowed deeper under the covers. That had been a rough time, especially for poor little Noboru, but they pulled through and their strangle family become stronger for it.

 

Aina and Takumi had been supportive of their new younger brother, who was at first rather weary of them. He’d been afraid of Hashirama too - the Senju’s heart broke when the boy first opened his dark eyes to look around the unknown room he was in, apparently scared and confused. Glancing him, he started to cry and didn’t stop until Madara rushed in, picked him up and hushed him on a gentle tone that made Hashirama love him even more. Maybe Noboru knew him from before as they were the same clan, maybe his parents mentioned him as he clung to the other Uchiha from that moment.

 

They never learned what happened, Noboru didn’t remember, or didn’t want to talk about that fatal night and they didn’t push him for details. There was no changing of the events, no bringing back the dead after all, so the best to do was to work on a better future instead.

 

Madara turned out to be a good father. Hashirama was always sure he could be, but knew his lover had many doubts about his whole adopting-children idea… it was good to be proven right. He’d be an excellent grandfather too, once Aina gave birth to her child.

 

He smiled. He was starting to accept this whole _grandfather_ thing. It wasn’t as if it necessarily made him older. They’d have many cute little toddlers around once all of their children found their partners for life and they’d have all the right to spoil them rotten. Well of course Madara would be stricter and lay all the rules. Was he looking forward to it now that he knew about Aina’s pregnancy?

 

He took the news… hm. It could have been worse. Well, Hashirama was a bit sore after last night, but it wasn’t something he minded. How absurd was from Madara to think he was cheating on him, but it was also so typical. He could only blame himself for not telling him the truth sooner, so his lover came to his false conclusion. Of course he’d been furious with the pregnancy too - Hashirama had to peel his fingers off from his throat by force in the end, so he wouldn’t choke - but the night ended with moving to their bed from the floor where they made slow love for a long-long time, than falling asleep together, so surely he’d be in an agreeable mood today. Maybe he should - just to be sure - keep him in bed for the morning as well. He was starting to get ready for it by recalling last night’s events, so…

 

Madara wasn’t in bed with him.

 

He realized it before opening his eyes and was immediately gripped by a strong, foreboding feeling. He was sure he wasn’t just up inhumanly early - which was actually his habit - no, there could only be one single reason for it.

 

Swearing, Hashirama jumped out from the bed to hastily collect his crumpled clothes from the floor to drag them up then rushed out from the house.

 

He had to be real quick to save Minoru Rinha’s life.

 

*/*/*

 

 

It was very early morning, barely over the crack of dawn. Tobirama was an early waker, but not to this extent. Still he was here, leaning against a trunk of a tree, staring up at the house that stood up on the slope with a grim expression. It was where the Rinha family lived.

 

He was tired, sleep deprived and wondered if he should have listened to his wife and had gone to talk to Hashirama first.

 

They had an actual fight over his niece’s pregnancy. Mito never raised her voice with him before and it took him by surprise. She thought he was crossing the line with interrogating Noboru so thoroughly. It had to be her influence, as Tobirama did feel bad about it afterwards, but at least he learned what was going on. And he had to act, hadn’t he, before his brother made some stupid, romantic decision _again_ which the leader of the first and strongest shinobi village just wasn’t supposed to make.

 

Mito was very vehement that they should leave the decision to Aina, which was crazy - she was too much Hashirama’s daughter to think things through rationally. She obviously had to marry and if nobody was going to make her do it, than it was up to Tobirama to make the unpopular but necessary decision - as always.

 

He just wished it wasn’t so damned early, but he escaped home before Mito woke up. Angry women - and angry red headed, hot tempered Uzumaki women especially - made him feel edgy. Now he had to stand here and wait for the hour to be more acceptable before he could speak with the father and grandfather to be about having affairs with the Hokage’s daughter and the consequences afterwards…

 

“Just what the hell are _you_ doing here?”

 

He turned to find the last person on earth he wanted to meet. Madara was looking as unrested and bad tempered as he was feeling.

 

“I gather that you learned it as well?”

 

“Don’t tell me that even you knew it before me.”

 

“Given that we are here at the same time, I guess we learned about it at the same time.”

 

“I don’t see how this is your concern,” Madara narrowed his eyes. He had so deep purple bags under them as if he’d been punched. But that would have been too good to be truth. “Why don’t you get lost and let me deal with my family’s problems?”

 

“In case you haven’t noticed, it’s my family too.”

 

“Hpmf. Believe me, I’m more than capable of smoothing this alone.”

 

“I’m here to make sure that the Rinha boy understands his responsibilities and marries Aina.”

 

“What…?! Something like that might be acceptable where you’re coming from, _Senju,_ but scum like him won’t get to marry _my_ daughter, that’s for sure.”

 

“Then just how do you want to smooth this?”

 

As an answer, Madara drew out a kunai from his sleeve.

 

“Are you out of your mind,” Tobirama whispered. “You can’t do something like that in the middle of the village!” Not that the idea was without merit, but it wasn’t how things were done.

 

“Are you saying that I don’t have the right to revenge my daughter’s lost innocence? Now get out of my way.”

 

“Don’t be such an idiot,” Tobirama snapped. “If you kill him now, Aina will still remain pregnant _and_ unmarried. Not to mention everyone will immediately know it was you, and not even my brother will be able to gloss this over.” When Madara tried to move past him, he blocked his way, well aware of the sharp blade in the Uchiha’s grip. He couldn’t believe he was trying to save Madara by stopping him. Not that he could do it by force - painful as it was, the shorter man was stronger than him and they both knew it very well. So he had to try to reason the way he understood too. “They need to bond as soon as possible and then… he’s a shinobi after all and shinobi die early.”

 

“Hmm,” the Uchiha seemed to be contemplating this. “Even so,” he said slowly at last “he’s a nobody - he shouldn’t get to marry my daughter, no matter the circumstances. I’ll make him disappear and find a better candidate. She will marry someone from my clan.”

 

“Oh, now that’s stupid! Her marriage would be a good opportunity to enforce our bond with other nations. We absolutely don’t need more bonding with the Uchiha. Mito has this cousin…”

 

“Well, I won’t be mingling with that woman’s…”

 

“ _Mokuton: Kajukai Koorin_! Damn it, I can’t believe you two!”

 

Tobirama could do nothing more than to glare at his brother before the pollens took effect and he slipped to the ground unconscious.

 

The next thing he knew was Hashirama arguing with Madara on low tones. He tried and failed to move, so he opened his eyes to a crack to peer at them. The older Senju apparently dragged them into the shadow of bushes and bound them with his technique - it was a lucky thing they were at the edge of the village, Tobirama really didn’t want anyone to see him being immobilized by the strong vines.

 

“...have you stopped to think for a moment how would Aina feel if you killed the boy? I’m not impressed with him either, but bloody hell Madara, this is not the solution. He’s just some stupid, irresponsible kid.”

 

“He’s eighteen, hardly a kid! He knew very well what he was doing…”

 

“Aina knew just as well, believe me! She has just an equal responsibility in this!”

 

“Don’t you dare to put her at the same level!”

 

Hashirama threw his hands up and turned towards Tobirama, who had been enjoying too much how Madara was being berated to close his eyes in time and pretend he was still unconscious.

 

“And you, brother.  You’ve now crossed all boundaries with your meddling. I always wanted you two to get on better, but I’ve changed my mind. It’s best if you never agree on anything. How could you both seriously consider murdering that boy and finding Aina a husband against her will?! I’ll let both of you know,” his voice took a cold, deep tone that never failed to shush Tobirama, even against his will. It apparently had the same effect on Madara too. “that she is very much her own person and not our possession! She will decide who she wants to marry, if anyone. Madara, after the choice we had made - I’m so very disappointed that I have to tell you this. If you want the best for her, let her find someone she can love as much as we love each other. And now,” he took a breath as if wanting to give them room to object, but the two bound men were silent “I’m going to talk to Minoru. He’s going to be a father and he has a right to know it. Then it’s up to him and Aina to decide how they wish to continue. I warn you both, if any harm comes to him, I’ll make you pay.”

 

He left them alone in the shadows, immobilized. Tobirama cast a glance at the Uchiha. He was looking after Hashirama with a strange look in his eyes that made the white haired man flush with embarrassment. He cleared his throat and Madara quickly shifted his expression back to his usual annoyed anger.

 

“I can’t believe he left us here like this. Such a talk too…”

 

“He’s a naive fool,” Madara agreed with him quickly. His tone was suspiciously soft. Affectionate. “Let him do what he pleases. I’ll do what I think the best as well.”

 

“Aina needs to marry,” Tobirama pointed out as he was afraid they started to forget about this.

 

“Or course.”

 

“I was wondering… How do you feel about Kagami?”

 

“Huh?”

 

“Uchiha Kagami. From your clan as you wished and someone I think worthy as well.”

 

“Let me make something clear, Tobirama. This doesn’t make me your ally. Nor will make me ever forgive you.”

 

“Who the hell wants your alliance? Or your forgiveness for that matter? We just happen to have a common problem and we both agree on the solution. There’s nothing more to it!”

 

“Good. In that case I’ve nothing against Kagami.”

 

“Then we have an agreement. Just how long my dear brother is going to take? I really don’t want anyone to find me like this, especially in present company.”

  
“Then why don’t you shut up, so they won’t hear us?”


	7. Chapter 7

*/*/*

 

Family gatherings were usually fun. Sure, Uncle and Madara-san never got on well, and with Mito-san both of their fathers were a bit awkward, but Aina still enjoyed these occasions most of the time. But tonight was an exception - it was nothing but a nightmare. She wished to be somewhere else - anywhere else, fighting a desperate life-and-death battle, greatly outnumbered by her foes, after starving for days in the deserts of Land of Wind. But she couldn’t leave as this was happening because of her. She might as well accept it as her punishment.

 

They all sat around the low table for dinner, but everyone was just picking their food. Facing her was dad - while he usually was the heart of these happenings, right now he was very tense, to the point he appeared grim. He kept shooting annoyed glances at Madara-san and their uncle, which both men promptly ignored. They seemed to be - for the first time Aina could remember - getting on with each other. At least compared to the usual thinly veiled insults and murderous glares. They tended to use Hashirama as their lightning rod between them, but this time they sat close to each other. Aina even caught Madara-san leaning close to Uncle to whisper something to him. Mito-san next to her husband was looking rather annoyed. Little Butsuma was in her lap, playing with food, and got away with it without scolding as his father didn’t notice it as he usually did.

 

Still on that side of the table was Uchiha Kagami. He looked very uncomfortable, as if not even sure why he was there. Aina could understand - she had no idea what he was doing in their house either. He was uncle’s apprentice, she knew about him that much. From time to time again, dad spared him one of his angry glances too.  It made her feel sorry for him, as he seemed to try to appear invisible every time. He cast longing glances at the door, but his path was, maybe accidentally, blocked by Uncle Tobirama.

 

Next to Aina sat Minoru, staring at her with wide-eyed wonder that made her feel more than uncomfortable. He was so busy doing this that he didn’t even seem to notice Madara-san’s anger with him, which was saying a lot. His father though, who was unfortunate enough to be invited to this little gathering from hell too, saw it and didn’t know what to do. He already apologised for nothing at least three times during the evening, bowing low. On Aina’s left side Takumi was fuming and Noboru was not talking to anyone. The two boys had an argument over the youngest eavesdropping on them, on why Aina and Takumi were not telling him the secret right away, why Noboru confessed to Uncle. Maybe it was the worst thing of all - ever since they could consider each other siblings, they got on really well. One more thing for her to feel sorry about.

 

Everyone was being miserable because of her. She wished they would shout at her, blame her… but nobody seemed to be angry with her, just with everyone else. It was terrible.

 

They shared a very tense dinner that never wanted to come to its end. Finally Madara-san leaned back and _shared a look_ with Uncle. Aina felt all her shinobi reflexes screaming danger at her seeing something so ominous.

 

“Kids,” the Uchiha said. “Why don’t you leave us alone for a while?”

 

Aina heard Takumi mutter something rude next to her as he got to his feet. She guessed that despite the life growing in her belly, she was counted as a kid this time, so she stood up as well. It was getting a bit difficult lately.

 

“Kagami, you heard Madara,” Uncle barked.

 

“Erm, yes, but…” he seemed confused - in his early twenties he certainly expected to be counted as an adult. He cast glance asking for help at Madara-san, but he just nodded in the direction of the door as well.

 

Once outside, they gathered around awkwardly. Her brothers seemed to be sulking, the two other boys just plain confused with what was happening. Aina wished she asked Mito-san if she could take Butsuma from her - she was spending a lot of time with him and his mom lately - something she was annoyed with Hashirama at first, but by now she was happy he insisted. They got on really well with the older woman and the boy was teaching her all kind of things about children she never considered.

 

But her little cousin remained with the _adults,_ not giving her the chance to busy herself with playing with him.

 

“Kagami-san,” she turned to the young man with a strained smile. “I’m not sure I cached the reason for your visit…”

 

“Oh, well - Madara-sama sent me an erm, _invite_ saying he expects me here. I’m a bit confused myself… I’ve just learned the news Aina-san, and let me congratulate…”

 

“Aina,” Minoru interrupted, as if he wasn’t even hearing Kagami talking “do you think we can drop out for a bit? I really need to talk to you in private?”

 

She felt Takumi shift behind her, so before he could open his mouth, she quickly nodded. She was feeling bad about keeping her secret for so long - and letting Hashirama break the news in the end. He was going to be a father of their child after all - she found the concept easier to be accepted. It was really due time she took on the responsibility and stopped avoiding confrontation.

 

She was going to be a mother in a handful of months. She had to start acting in a way that next time she wouldn’t be sent out with the kids.

 

*/*/*

 

“Honestly Madara, Kagami? They don’t even know each other with Aina!”

 

“Well, maybe they should.”

 

“Matchmakers! You and Tobirama are playing matchmakers! I can’t believe it,” from dad’s tone it was impossible to tell whether he was angry or amused. Probably both. Noboru peered up at his brother. Takumi had his ears against the door, frowning, so he quickly put his head back too, not to miss a world.

 

“Are you any better? You invited _that boy_ as well.”

 

“That’s different! _That boy_ is going to be the _father_ or _our_ grandchild!”

 

He enjoyed that they were finally doing something together, even if it was just eavesdropping. He was also glad that his brother was no longer mad with him - they had quite an argument over while he spilled the beans to Uncle Tobirama and why his older siblings didn’t confide him in such a secret.

 

Aina placated him in the end, apologising to Noboru and cooling Takumi off with saying that if their Uncle set his mind to it, he could get information he wanted even from the dead. She was really acting like a grown up lately - she used to be in every mischief, but now she didn’t even want to join them trying to find out what today’s terrible dinner was about. Considering what their fathers were talking about, maybe it was for the best.

 

“Hashirama, I’m not saying that she has to marry Kagami straight away. She can get to know him first. Learn to like him.”

 

“And what if she won’t like him?”

 

“...why wouldn’t she? He’s patient and respectful - he can even stand your brother. Rather talented. Handsome. An Uchiha.”

 

“Just because he’s your type, it doesn’t mean Aina will like him too.”

 

“What are you talking about? I’m just trying to be objective.”

 

“If I think about it, I’m very flattered. I’m here with you despite my linage.”

 

“Well,” they fall silent. It was a pity they couldn’t see, only hear them. “...anyhow, for my daughter, I want the best.” Madara-san sounded just a bit out-of breath when he spoke again.

 

“Are you implying that I’m not good?”

 

“Let’s face it - you’re a Senju…” a sigh. Noboru frowned. Were they… “...but for a Senju, you’re not _too_ bad.”

 

“Be careful there, you might compliment me if you don’t watch yourself.”

 

“Why don’t you stop talking and…. yes… do that instead.” Another deep sigh and a _moan_.

 

The boys outside took a step back from the door at the same time, looked at each other and made a face.

 

“This keeps happening when I’m listening on them,” Noboru said to his brother outside. He was fighting laughter, and losing, seeing the other’s expression. “They are terrible. Two old men like them and they keep going at it,” he thought back at those idiots accusing dad getting tired of Madara-san and… Only someone who didn’t know him at all would think something like _that_.

 

“You’re too damned young to talk like that!” Takumi laughed along with him, obviously just as embarrassed as he was for not stopping their eavesdropping in time. “He really loves dad, doesn’t he?” he asked quietly a bit later.

 

“I guess so… it’s pretty obvious. They love us as well,” he added, as the older boy suddenly appeared rather lost.

 

“Well, he should let Aina decide on her own who she wants in that case!” he snapped.

 

“You have to admit that an Uchiha is better choice than anyone else.”

 

“Why you little… I’ll teach you that your brother is superior!” he moved to grab him, but Noboru knew him too well - he was already dashing away, out to the streets.

 

“You have to catch me for that first,” he shouted back over his shoulder. Takumi was right on his heels and he’d probably catch him - he was fast on his long legs. He didn’t mind it much. A playful struggling only meant that things were getting back to normal finally.

  


*/*/*

 

 

After all the difficulties around the beginning of Aina’s pregnancy, things got back to the peacefulness of everydays fairly quickly. Sure, there were changes Takumi wasn’t pleased about, but he found himself getting used to them.

 

Like Minoru Rinha’s frequent appearance in their home. He came by to talk with Aina several times a week. At first Takumi was more than irritated by it and didn’t try to hide it - he managed to be rude to the point when Aina felt she had to sit down with him and talk.

 

“Listen,” she had said “I know that you’re angry with him. But really - it’s not his fault, at least no more than mine… and he’s going to be the father of this child.” She gently caressed her growing belly. “And he’s been rather cool about it.”

 

“So you and him…”

 

“Oh no,” she laughed. “We’re just friends and there’s no more to it. Friends and parents of the same baby.”

 

Though he didn’t worry much about Minoru taking away Aina from them after that, he wasn’t the only one proving to be a risk. Uchiha Kagami also visited often, at first trying to make excuses why he was there, _Madara-sama asked me to deliver a report to him, Tobirama-sensei asked me to pick up something from Hokage-sama._ Soon however he was just telling he dropped by to see how Aina is doing - and she happened to be doing very well every the time he was around, smiling at him warmly. Soon enough she was going out for walks with him, leaving Takumi to stare bitterly after them.

 

So when his teammate asked him timidly if he’d like to share a dango with her, he said yes. They ended up having a pretty good time - funny, but he never noticed before that she had really great sense of humour and that her eyes were very pretty with their long lashes...

 

…she had a nice smile too…

 

“You’ve been daydreaming a lot lately,” dad winked at him once when he visited him in his office. From the three of them, Takumi was his most frequent visitor; Madara-san managed to convince his sister and brother that they shouldn’t disturb him during the day, but the teen was very well aware that _Hokage-sama_ was more than grateful for any break he could take away from paperwork.

 

“There’s this girl…” he sighed.

 

“I thought there might be.”

 

“Dad, did you ever have a girlfriend? Before you hooked up with Madara-san?”

 

“I did. Though I was a bit older than you at the time.”

 

“Really?” he was more than surprised. “I thought you were always totally…” dad raised an eyebrow at him, so he quickly amended his words “...erm, had the eyes only for him. So what happened to her? That girl.”

 

“She died long ago. It was well before the village was founded. They were dangerous times and shinobi died young.”

 

“Did you love her?”

 

“I liked her. If you ask if I was in love with her - no, I wasn’t.”

 

Of course. That’s reserved for Madara-san, the teen thought. He wasn’t sure he understood this dedicated love they shared - it was somehow reassuring that he wasn’t Hashirama’s first and only.

 

“So if I ask you for tips…”

 

“Oh no,” he laughed. “I think I was really lame, and she might have only put up with me as I was the leader of the clan. If you want tips on how to win girls, you have to ask your uncle.”

 

Takumi grinned along. He could just picture him, a gangly teen as he was now, all awkward and blushing when asking a girl out. He still founded Konoha and became its leader. That was an uplifting thought.

 

“How did you manage to win Madara-san? He must have been a thousand times pickier than any girl!”

 

“Hmm,” he clasped his fingers at his nape, leaning back in his chair, looking up at the ceiling as he contemplated the question. “I guess it had to be my stone skipping skills.”

  
Takumi snorted. That was not an answer at all, but probably it was the best if he didn’t push it.


	8. Chapter 8

 

***/*/***

 

Hashirama was sitting on his heels, his sweaty palms on his knees, trying to appear calm and composed. Watching Madara pace back and forth, back and forth, stopping suddenly to glare angrily at the closed door, start his pacing again didn’t make the already hard task easier.

 

“Would you tell him to stop doing this,” Tobirama growled on a low tone. Madara turned sharply towards him.

 

“It’s _my_ daughter giving birth in there,” he whispered furiously - they were given clear instructions to keep their voices down. “Though, for some reason I can’t understand, _that woman_ gained the right to order me out!”

 

“ _That woman_ happens to be _my wife...”_

 

Hashirama tried to tune them out. He knew they were nervous and if he tried to intervene they’d just pour their frustration on him. Everything was going to be all right, he told himself firmly. Mito-san had the perfect control over the situation. Everything was going to be all right, and if anything might happen still, he was here to help. He spent the last month with researching any healing technique that might be needed for a difficult pregnancy.

 

Not that Aina had a particularly hard time up till now. At least he was told repeatedly that all symptoms her daughter produced were completely normal. She even told him that her biggest problem was all the males around her worrying were driving her mad. Hashirama, Madara, her brothers, her uncle, Minoru and even Kagami. That the only person keeping her sane was Mito-san.

 

Hashirama felt bad about it, but he still couldn’t stop worrying.

 

He peered at all these guilty males waiting outside the room in various states of distress. He could understand Aina had a hard time because of them.

 

“Keep your voice down,” he tried to hush Madara and Tobirama, as their argument started to get out of hand. Predictably they glared at him, but at least they fall silent. Both Mito-san and the midwife she insisted to lead the childbirth instead of Hashirama were very adamant that the place of men was outside and that they shouldn’t bother the mother with being loud.

 

After what seemed like an endless wait the door finally opened and the old, withered midwife came out. Her disapproving glance swept over the seven men gathered outside.

 

“Both mother and baby girl are fine,” she barked. Hashirama felt tension easing up in him. “Father goes in first,” she glowered at Madara who wanted to brush in next to her. The Senju quickly stood up and put a hand on his lover’s shoulder before he’d do something regrettable to this brave woman. “The mother and baby need rest, so all you lot can’t charge in at the same time. You’ll have enough opportunity later to see them.”

 

“If I could be allowed to see my own daughter in my own house,” Madara growled.

 

“Hmpf,” she looked up at him without the slightest sign of fear. As she had said to Hashirama when Mito-san introduced her, she was well past the age when the antics of men could impress her. “Grandfathers go in when the father is finished.”

 

“She called me grandfather,” Madara said frowning after her.

 

“Well we are,” Hashirama smiled at him. “Isn’t it great?” His lover must have felt really overwhelmed as he let the Senju put his arm around his neck and pull him close, even though others could see.

 

Minoru didn’t take long in the room. When he came out, beaming with happiness. Mito-san was also with him, smiling at Hashirama upon catching his anxious expression and despite his impatience he managed to smile back. He was glad that they started to get on better lately.

This time Madara didn’t even mutter a scratching comment on seeing that as finally, _finally_ they could go in to see Aina.

 

She looked tired, but was smiling down at the little wrinkled, red-faced package of baby sleeping in her arms.

 

“Look Dad, isn’t she beautiful?”

 

“Sure she is, honey.” He wasn’t prepared for the sudden rush of memories the newborn evoked. He used to take care of the Itama when their mom died shortly after giving birth to him - it was so long ago, it seemed like a different lifetime. So many children died since then - but now they were here, in the village they dreamt and made to come true with Madara, to keep the new generation safe. Aina’s baby girl - his granddaughter - shouldn’t face what he and his brothers had to face. There were so many things to do still, so many lives to protect. It was an impossibly huge task to save everyone, he knew very well, but with his family here, with his children and Madara by his side, he had the strength to try it again and again.

 

“May I?” Madara asked quietly, holding his arms out, and Hashirama used the opportunity to rub his eyes quickly free of tears. Aina smiled so warmly at the Uchiha as she gently handled the baby over that it melted his heart.

 

If their daughter was surprised at the skilful way Madara held the baby, she didn’t show it. Hashirama reminded himself that he wasn’t the only one growing up with younger brothers. It was impossible to tell what the Uchiha was thinking of the newcomer; he was staring down at her with a solemn, unreadable expression.

 

“How will you call her?” he asked after a while. His voice was equally serious and emotionless.

 

“Tsunade.”

 

“Senju or Uchiha?”  

 

“She’s both, after all, isn’t she, Madara-san? And Iwa as well, after my father. She can use any name she will want later. Or you know. She can be simply herself.”

 

The baby opened her bluish eyes, staring up at Madara, unseeing. The Uchiha was looking down back at her with a faraway expression on his face. Hashirama wasn’t sure what or who he was seeing, this new life who just came to this world, or one that passed away a long time ago. Aina noticed that something was going on too, and shot an anxious look at him, so he stepped up to his lover and put a gentle hand on his shoulder. Madara blinked and seemed to come back to the present. With great care he laid the baby back to Aina’s arms.

 

“You are such a good girl,” he told her quietly. “Teach her that - to be herself. You’ll be a good mother for her,” he touched her face in an almost-caress before he straightened up and strode out of the room.

 

Hashirama crouched down next to the bed, and his daughter embraced his neck. He could feel her tears falling steadily on his skin.

 

“Is he alright?” she asked on a throaty voice. “He never told me anything like this before.”

 

“He was just very overwhelmed, honey. He loves you. I love you too. And we are proud of you.”

 

“Dad, I really hope that giving birth wasn’t the biggest accomplishment of my life. Sure it was damn though, but… Dad, are you crying?”

 

“I’m sorry, darling,” he let her go, as he was afraid they would disturb little Tsunade, and sat down on the floor rather. “You must think we’re both completely crazy.”

 

“I _know_ that you’re both completely crazy, Dad.”

 

Hashirama smiled, drying his tears with his sleeve.

 

“It’s just that I lost so many people. And Madara, he lost _everyone._ By the time we founded the village, it was already too late, he had nobody left.”

 

“But he had you.”

 

“I was hardly a suitable compensation for his whole family, all his loved ones who he couldn’t save… but why am I telling you this again, you heard it a million times.”

 

“You know I love your story. It’s so romantic,” she shifted on her pillows. She looked very tired, and that made Hashirama feel bad for forcing her to watch her fathers’ emotional storms at a time like this.

 

“Anyhow, you three came into our lives and now that little Tsunade is here as well - finally it really feels that Konoha was not built in vain,” he stood up to place a kiss on her forehead. “I won’t disturb you more now, you need rest. Your brothers will want to see you too. Kagami is here as well…”

 

“Dad,” Aina grabbed his arm with surprising force. “Do _not_ let Kagami come in. Please. He can’t see me in this state.”

 

“You look beautiful, darling.”

 

“For you, maybe, but you don’t count! Dad!”

 

“All right, all right, I’ll keep him out.”

***/*/***

 

He wasn’t hiding. He just wanted to be left alone, not wanting to meet anyone. He wasn’t hiding, but maybe he should have picked a place where Hashirama couldn’t find him straight away.

 

Or maybe he was hiding, but wanted to be found by Hashirama.

 

“Madara, you’re in there for very long. I’m coming in.”

 

“No respect for privacy,” he muttered, sinking lower, until the water came up till his nose.

 

Hashirama either didn’t hear him or ignored him, as he came in to the bathroom and crouched down next to the tub.

 

“Water’s gone cold,” he dangled his hand in Madara’s bath, ignoring the glare directed at him. “Why don’t you get out?”

 

“I’m fine,” as he had to emerge to reply him anyway, he leaned back, resting his head on the brim. He watched with eyes opened to the barest of crack as his lover rolled up his sleeve and picked up the sponge. He held back a pleased sigh when he started to rub his chest gently with it. “Have all those people finally gone from my home?” he demanded.

 

“Yes, they’ve left. Takumi and Noboru were watching over Aina and Tsunade when I left them. So you can safely come out.”

 

“Leave me alone, I’m fine here.”

 

“Hmm.”

 

He was rubbing his arms in soft little circles. It wasn’t washing him - Madara was soaking for long enough and by no means dirty anyway, but it felt fine, so he let him.

 

“Speak with Aina tomorrow. I think you got her worried.”

 

“Why? I didn’t do anything.”

 

“Madara…”

 

He turned his head away, hoping that Hashirama would understand that he didn’t want to talk about this at all. The other man took his hand and washed his fingers one by one with the sponge.

 

“Even if the situation is not the easiest, I’m really happy Aina has the baby,” he told Madara, not looking up from his silly little task. “It really gives the feeling that things have now changed for the better, doesn’t it?  She won’t have such a childhood we had. She won’t be left alone either. She will have brothers, sisters, cousins later. Butsuma is close to her age as well and guess what - Tobirama told me that Mito-san is expecting their second child!”

 

 _Is that supposed to make me feel better?_ Madara thought, but Hashirama was looking so earnest, so wanting him to be content with the situation, that he stayed quiet.

 

“Aina and the boys will never be alone with such grave responsibility as we used to have. They have us and each other. A whole village behind them as support… There’s Minoru and Kagami too, to help her…”

 

“Even if they didn’t get married,” Madara muttered.

 

“Erm,” he broke the ardour of Hashirama’s speech and he was almost sorry for it. Listening to his naive enthusiasm wasn't so bad. He found that he could even make himself believe it for a short time at least. “They can still get married now that Tsunade was born, can’t they?”

 

The Uchiha sighed. And other times it got a bit bothersome how he tried to ignore all negative things in their lives. About a week ago he overheard his lover and their daughter talking. Aina was very firm on her belief that she didn’t need to get married. Saying that she’d be always afraid, Kagami was with her for being the Hokage’s and Uchiha Madara’s daughter only if they bonded officially. That love wasn’t something that needed anybody’s approval. And the stupid Senju just soothed her, agreeing that honest emotions and happiness mattered more than any formal ceremony.

 

“Hashirama, do you really think I know nothing?” he asked with a sigh. Dark eyes darted away guiltily.

 

“I just want everyone to be happy and safe.”

 

“Maybe it’s time you grow up now that you’re a grandfather, and gave up on impossible dreams.”

 

“We’ve already made impossible dreams come true, didn’t we? Why should we stop?”

  
“Have you considered that you’re not doing Aina any good with letting her live that kind of life? People will put her through hell for it.”

“We’re here to protect…”

 

“Hashirama, we won’t be here forever. I doubt that we’ll die of old age either. You won’t be able to protect them always,” he watched his lover’s expression turning solemn. It was a painful thing to say, but it was the truth. He’d do no good with pretending this possibility didn’t exist in their future, so there was no reason for him to feel bad for making Hashirama sad.

 

“I know that,” he replied, straightening up. Madara thought he’ll leave the room, but instead he unfastened his robes, getting undressed quickly. “But that doesn’t mean I can’t do my best for the time being.”

 

“What are you doing?”

 

“Taking a bath with you.”

 

“Wait, no. There’s not enough room for…”

 

But he was already in, sloshing around the by now cold water, bumping against Madara as he sat down behind his back. Ignoring all his complaints, he embraced him, until the shorter man gave in, and laid his head back on the other’s strong shoulder. Hashirama started to ease out the tangles from his wet locks and that made him sigh contentedly

 

“Anyway,” the Senju picked up the conversation after a while, “who said that we have to die before our time? I think we’re both capable of living long. I’m looking forward to getting old and wrinkled with you.”

 

“I’m not going to have wrinkles,” he said, because he had no reply to the rest. It was so improbable that they would live long - pretending otherwise would just make it harsher when the time came to… part.

 

“Hmm. Then having grey hair. Silver. You’ll look amazing with silver hair.”

 

“I’m going to dye it.”

 

“It’s not as if anyone is capable of killing us, not even separately, and definitely not if we stand together.”

 

“Maybe it won’t be even a fight. Maybe your brother will snap and poison you, so finally he can be the Hokage after you.”

 

“That’s not funny.”

 

He shrugged. Living long. He’d never even considered the possibility. Wasn’t it what they had learned from the moment they got old enough to be named a shinobi? Live day by day, as you could never know which breath would be your last. You might be strong, but someone else might be faster. You might be fast, but someone else might use dirtier tricks. Had that changed as well? Maybe. They were the first ones to live in this era. Who knew yet how their lives and deaths would be?

 

“Madara?”

 

“Hmm.”

 

“The times have changed. _We_ have changed the world we live in. We can also make such a small thing too - living long,” he smiled at that. Trust Hashirama to answer his unspoken doubts. He might try to believe him. For his sake. For their children’s sake.

 

How did his life take this unexpected path? It wasn’t the first time he wondered. Sometimes he pictured there was another Uchiha Madara somewhere, who left Hashirama and Konoha, just as he had been planning. Who had never looked back, never softened. Who had made a different choice and declared Senju Hashirama his enemy instead of his friend and lover. He used to wonder if he should be that man. Nowadays he found that he was glad he wasn’t.

 

“Hashirama?”

 

“Yes?”

 

“If you dare to die before me, I swear I’m going after you to the other side and make you pay.”

 

 

**FIN**

 

**Art drawn by[luthielkaeyl](http://luthielkaeyl.tumblr.com/) and used with permission of the artist.**


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